Humungous Fungus is among us
And it’s rather smelly.
It slowly creeps between your toes
Then right up to your belly.
It can be blue, but when it’s pink
It gives off such an awful stink.
Sometimes it floats down in the breeze
And leaves great blobs on both your knees.
When it sparkles like a fairy
Then you must be very wary.
If it waves its magic wand
You’ll smell like slime from next door’s pond.
Beware if Fungus goes to school.
It doesn’t care who looks a fool.
Your teacher might get quite a shock
If Fungus hides inside his sock.
If poor grandma, while she’s sitting
Concentrating on her knitting
Notices a sudden pull
It’s Fungus climbing up her wool.
Even mum must be quite careful
She might cop a blobby hair full
If she happens to be shopping
Right where Fungus slime is dropping.
Family pets should run and hide
‘Cos Fungus loves to slip and slide
Into kennels, baskets, cages
Sending critters into rages.
But Fungus loathes a water spray
So get yourself one right away.
And squirt that fiend with all your might
You’ll be a hero overnight.
Pat Simmons © 2014