Pat’s Café

Have you heard about this restaurant? They call it Pat’s Café,

It’s famous for its specialties like ‘Dungball of the Day’,

The punters flock from far afield to try the bolognaise,

Made from the finest cow manure and slurry mayonnaise.

They do a lovely paddock pie (the critics all agree),

That’s cooked from fresh ingredients they grow organically,

And for the connoisseur there’s much to make them lick their lips,

Like cowpat flavoured fizzy-pop with battered dung and chips,

But the top dish on the menu simply has to be a scoop,

Of dung ice-cream and sprinkles with a giant squirt of poop.

Yes, Pat’s Café gets rave reviews from diners in the know,

There’s nowhere else that dung beetles with taste would rather go.

Chris Owen 2018