“Our Yeti” by Chris Owen


Our Yeti

We went to the pet shop to buy a new kitten but ended up getting a yeti.

The shopkeeper said, ‘It eats two-minute noodles and oodles of homemade spaghetti.’


We took our new yeti to meet Aunty Betty whose pantry is chockful of noodles,

 But, sadly, the yeti devoured Auntie Betty and three of her pedigree poodles.


Our yeti then quickly became very sickly. We rushed it along to the vet,

Who said, ‘I’ve seen creatures with hideous features, but this is the yuckiest yet.’


I told him our yeti mistook Aunty Betty for something decidedly yummy,

And eating the poodles instead of the noodles was giving it pains in the tummy.


The vet looked perplexed so he ran a few checks. Then he finally made a suggestion,

‘I think in the end I will just recommend an apple to aid the digestion


Then in a trice (this bit isn’t nice) our gluttonous pet from Tibet,

the big hairy brute, after eating the fruit, proceeded to swallow the vet.


Those large yeti lips then spat out the pips, some spectacles, shoes and a sweater.

And then, I must say, by the end of the day our pet did appear to be better.


Now we’ve trained our pet yeti to eat its spaghetti and noodles so no one gets hurt.

And now, if it’s good and behaves as it should, it gets to have extra dessert.


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