Hello, reader. I am me.
I’m climbing up this mighty tree.
I’ll climb and climb and never stop.
I’ll climb it to the very top.
I’m climbing in the dark of night,
With moon and stars to give me sight,
And when at last I reach the crown,
I’ll turn around and climb back down.
Why, goodness gracious, who are you?
And why are you a brilliant blue?
Colours in the depths of night? Explain yourself! It isn’t right!
I am an electric bird.
It really isn’t so absurd.
What did you expect to see
Inside an electricitree?
Electric birds? Electric trees?
Don’t take me for a moron, please!
Power runs along a wire.
You’re a fibber! You’re a liar!
Hold your horses. Do not scoff.
Watch me turning on and off.
See my colour come and go.
Don’t you like my little show?
By jingoes, I believe you’re right!
You really are a pretty sight.
I’m sorry I was rather short.
Electric birds, eh? Who’d have thought!
Not just birds, but also bees
You’ll find in electricitrees.
Instead of blue, they’re brilliant red.
See them buzzing round your head?
Electric bees I can’t believe.
You must have something up your sleeve!
I’m stung! Oh, I apologise!
The proof is here before my eyes.
It hurts! It hurts! Please help me, please!
I trust in your electric bees!
Please, oh please, remove the sting,
And I’ll believe in anything!
Hold quite still now. Do not move.
Let me settle in my groove.
I’ll take the sting out of your hand,
But listen close, and understand.
When you say they are not real
It hurts them. Think of how you’d feel
If someone said you don’t exist?
You’d roar and shout and shake your fist.
Bees can’t shake their fists, and so,
They do the only thing they know.
They sting. But listen, you’re in luck.
Imagine if they’d run amok
And stung and stung, and stung some more.
Then you would be very sore.
You are in their territory
Inside the electricitree.
Thank you. I am feeling better.
Your advice, right to the letter,
I will follow. There’s no chance…
Hey, something’s climbed inside my pants!
It’s got me laughing like a clown.
I’ll have to pull my trousers down.
There’s yellow dots upon my knees.
Help me! Help me! What are these?
Ah! I see electric ants
Have climbed up high inside your pants
Events like this must always be
Inside an electricitree.
Electric ants? Are you quite mad?
Or do you think a foolish lad
Like me will swallow any stuff
You throw at him? I call your bluff!
Electric birds. Electric bees.
Yes, I believe in all of these.
But now I’m shown electric ants.
Do I believe in them? Fat chance!
Oo! Ow! Oo! Ow! I feel a fire
On my legs, and even higher.
Help me, please, to put it out.
Is this a punishment for doubt?
Of course it is. You’re slow to learn,
And now, alas, your legs must burn,
But here, now, take this little leaf,
And rub it on. You’ll feel relief.
Oh thank you, thank you, little bird.
I promise I will trust your word
From now until eternity.
You’ve been so very good to me.
Electric birds. Electric bees.
Electric ants. Please, no more please.
I couldn’t cope with any more.
My hand still stings. My legs are sore.
Why, we have only just begun!
There’s lots more creatures, lots more fun.
Electric grubs. Electric moths.
We even have electric sloths!
They’re very fast. They love to chase
And jump and skip and leap and race.
Why, if you see a sloth that’s slow,
That means its battery is low.
Now, that’s the end! You’ve very mean
To fool a boy as young and green
As me. I simply can’t believe
Your tale, so I will take my leave.
I’ll leave the electricitree.
My bedroom is the place for me.
I have enjoyed your little show…
Hey, look! I have begun to glow!
Yes, you are young, and you are green.
Why, that’s the nicest shade I’ve seen.
What a treasure! What a joy!
We have our first electric boy!
© Stephen Whiteside 16.07.2013