Woops!
There once was a poor ballerina
Whose blue tutu was often much cleaner
But she munched on a biscuit
A blunder to risk it
A Tim-Tam, a small misdemeanour.
Pat Simmons
- Submitted in response to Poetry Prompt #17
Tag Archives: Pat Simmons
Poem of the Day
Leave a commentPortrait of a Puddle
I can tell you about the weather.
Am I growing or shrinking?
I can show you how a paper boat floats,
and be a mirror for your smiling face.
I can be a drink for a thirsty bird,
or a short slurp for a cat on the prowl.
I can annoy new shoes,
but splashing gum boots love me.
I can be a short stay hostel
for tadpoles or mozzie larvae.
I can be temporary and tempting.
I have possibilities and potential.
I am a puddle.
Pat Simmons
- Submitted in response to Poetry Prompt #11
Poem of the Day
Leave a commentFancy Dress
A Halloween party was held near the creek.
Preparing the costumes took almost a week.
Several koalas in purple were cloaked.
A curled up echidna was prodded and poked
into a hollowed out pumpkin shell, where
she peacefully slept and was quite unaware
that first prize went to platypus dressed in his skin.
No costume was needed for this guy to win.
Pat Simmons
- Submitted in response to Poetry Prompt #9
Poem of the Day
Leave a commentA Letter from the Principal
Dear Mr. Smith and Mrs. Smith,
I’m writing you this letter
because your son’s behaviour
isn’t getting any better.
His writing is untidy and
his spelling is a worry.
He’s often late and consequently,
always in a hurry.
His recent science project
nearly caused a school disaster.
The explosion covered twenty boys
in clouds of ceiling plaster.
He’s been with us for twenty years,
or is it twenty two?
Dear Mr. Smith and Mrs. Smith,
just what are we to do?
He’s untidy and he’s silly
and he always acts the fool,
but still the students say he’s
the best teacher in our school.
Pat Simmons
- Submitted in response to Poetry Prompt #4
Poem of the Day
Leave a commentThe Visit
Cautiously, creeping down the stairs,
carefully avoiding the creaks,
we stop
and take each other’s hand.
At the bottom we tiptoe,
trembling,
towards the door.
Almost afraid to breathe
we slowly, gently, push it open.
Beneath the twinkling lights
sit the gifts.
‘He’s been,’ we whisper
‘He’s been.’
Pat Simmons
(Published 2014 by Celapene Press, Short and Twisted and Thynks Publications Bards at Blidworth and Beyond Anthology)
- Submitted in response to Poetry Prompt #49
Poem of the Day
Leave a commentA Scorpion’s Search
A scorpion christened Cruella, left home to search for a fella.
She sifted through sand and she searched under slate.
She peered under pebbles to look for a mate.
She reached under rocks and she gazed at the ground
but a masculine mini beast couldn’t be found.
Cruella, poor creature, was filled with despair.
There had to be someone who loved her out there.
But wait! She heard rustling and spotted the cause.
From a burrow appeared some spectacular claws.
They belonged to a sumptuous scorpion male.
What glorious eyes, and that sting in his tail!
It was love at first sight for Cruella and friend,
Which is how satisfactory quests all should end.
Pat Simmons
- Submitted in response to Poetry Prompt #42
Poem of the Day
Leave a commentClowning Around
A clown with a cauliflower ear
Decided that he would appear
In a colander hat
With a cute climbing cat.
But the cat said
‘Not likely my dear.’
Pat Simmons
- Submitted in response to Poetry Prompt #36
Poem of the Day
Leave a commentMr Pickle’s Pet Shop
At Mr Pickle’s pet shop the choice is quite extensive.
It’s mystical and magical and not at all expensive.
Meet hairy dogs and scary dogs and one that yawns and yawns.
And playing in a nearby cage meet baby unicorns.
Meet fluffy cats and scruffy cats and one that’s always smiling.
Descended from a Cheshire cat, she really is beguiling.
At Mr Pickle’s pet shop the choice is quite extensive.
It’s wacky, weird and wonderful and not at all expensive.
Sitting in a large top hat, magicians’ rabbits wait.
One elegant white rabbit keeps insisting that he’s late.
Meet brown rats, black rats and some you can’t approach.
One claims a distant relative pulled Cinderella’s coach.
At Mr Pickle’s pet shop the choice is quite extensive.
It’s awesome and amazing and it’s not at all expensive.
Meet scowling owls and sleeping owls perched in a plastic tree.
There’s one that winks at pussy cats. He’d like to go to sea.
Meet blind mice, Miami mice and mice who have no tails.
They run and squeak, play hide and seek and terrify the quails.
At Mr Pickle’s pet shop the choice is quite extensive.
It’s curious, chaotic and it’s not at all expensive.
Meet rare, red romping dragons. No one’s quite sure of their ages.
But Mr Pickle says they MUST be kept in fireproof cages.
Meet fruit bats, cute bats, a vampire bat called Guzzle.
And just in case he misbehaves, he has to wear a muzzle.
At Mr Pickle’s pet shop the choice is quite extensive.
It’s bold, bizarre and beautiful and not at all expensive.
Meet frogs who change to princes if they receive a kiss.
Meet friendly bugs who give you hugs and snakes who simply hiss.
If you deserve a special pet to tell your troubles to,
Please visit Mr Pickle’s shop and tell him I sent you.
At Mr Pickle’s pet shop the choice is quite extensive.
It’s fabulous and fanciful and not at all expensive.
Pat Simmons
First published by Thynks Publications in their anthology 50 Funny Poems for Children.
- Submitted in response to Poetry Prompt #32
Poem of the Day
Leave a commentBuccaneer Tucker
A basin of broccoli served up for tea
Is not what a young buccaneer wants to see.
His diet should be balanced when pillaging ships,
But he’d much prefer ice cream and lots of hot chips.
Pat Simmons
- Submitted in response to Poetry Prompt #29
Poem of the Day
Leave a commentHumungous Fungus
Humungous Fungus is among us
And it’s rather smelly.
It slowly creeps between your toes
Then right up to your belly.
It can be blue but when it’s pink
It gives off such an awful stink.
Sometimes it floats down in the breeze
And leaves great blobs on both your knees.
When it sparkles like a fairy
Then you must be very wary.
If it waves its magic wand
You’ll smell like slime from next door’s pond.
Beware if Fungus goes to school
It doesn’t care who looks a fool.
Your teacher might get quite a shock
If Fungus hides inside his sock.
If poor Grandma while she’s sitting
Concentrating on her knitting
Notices a sudden pull
It’s Fungus climbing up her wool.
Even Mum must be quite careful
She might cop a blobby hair full
If she happens to be shopping
Right where Fungus slime is dropping.
Family pets should run and hide
‘Cos Fungus loves to slip and slide
Into kennels, baskets, cages
Sending critters into rages.
But Fungus loathes a water spray
So get yourself one right away
And squirt that fiend with all your might
You’ll be a hero overnight.
Pat Simmons
- Submitted in response to Poetry Prompt #25
Australian Children’s Poetry 