The Ballad of Molly Malloo: Part 2 by Chris Owen

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The Ballad of Molly Malloo: Part 2

 

 

In Stringybark Downs when there’s dew on the ground,

And the larks and the maggies are singing,

When blue skies abound, you can feel all around,

That springtime is finally springing.

 

And the dung beetle knows when the springtime has sprung,

It’s time to head out and go searching for dung,

For a soft gooey cowpat, though strange it may seem,

To a dung beetle, tastes like a scrumptious ice-cream.

 

So, this dung beetle flew over valleys and trees,

Till his nose caught the scent of some cows, on the breeze.

And where there are cows you will usually find

That freshly made cowpats are not far behind.

 

Quickly, the dung beetle had them in sight,

A couple of heifers, one brown and one white,

And he asked in a manner so very polite

(For his parents had taught him his wrong from his right),

 

 

“Please spare me a cowpat kind ladies.

Please spare me a cowpat or two.

I’ve just woken up from my slumber,

And I need a nice cowpat to chew.”

 

These cows, you’ll remember them, Jane and Lorraine,

Looked down in disgust and began to complain.

“Scuttle off! Get away! You’re cramping our style.

You’re simply revolting. You’re filthy! You’re vile!

The farmer is coming. We cannot be seen

With someone whose habits are quite so obscene.”

Oh, crikey! How mean!

 

Poor dung beetle. Really, what was he to do?

Perhaps they were right. Perhaps it was true.

His tummy was empty. His hunger pangs grew.

So, he slumped by the creek and he sobbed, “Boo-hoo-hoo.”

 

In Stringybark Downs, there echoed around

The boos and the moos of despair,

As fate brought together this cow and this beetle

With troubles they needed to share.

 

And she told how The Show was her one little dream,

And he talked about cowpats that taste of ice-cream.

She spoke of those heifers that just didn’t care,

And he said how those sisters had been so unfair.

 

Sighed the beetle, “We clear up the dung without fuss.

Imagine the mess if it wasn’t for us.”

“I can quite imagine it,” Molly replied,

As beautiful notions welled up from inside,

Until, in her mind, like a bolt from the blue,

A win-win solution just popped into view.

“Eureka!” she shouted, “I know what to do!”

 

“Clear my whole paddock of dung. That’s the plan.

Eat all my cowpats as quick as you can.

Don’t dilly, don’t dally,” said Molly, “make haste.

The farmer is coming. There’s no time to waste.”

 

How that dung beetle ate. Oh, he ate himself silly,

Gratefully guzzling dung willy-nilly.

He dined upon cowpats like never before,

Gorging himself till his tummy grew sore,

And full to the brim he could manage no more.

 

“I’m sorry, I’ve failed,” the dung beetle wailed,

“The plan’s come undone and you’re back to square one.”

Had the plot been a flop? Had her scheme been in vain?

Had Molly’s last hope disappeared down the drain?

 

To be continued…

The Ballad of Molly Malloo: Part 1 by Chris Owen

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The Ballad of Molly Malloo: Part 1

 


 

In Stringybark Downs when the clover is lush,

And the swallow is high on the wing,


When the blossom comes out and the bees hum about,


You can smell the arrival of spring.


 

And springtime, as any young heifer would know,

Is time for the Stringybark Downs Country Show,


Where they have, for those lucky enough to appear,


The chance to be crowned as ‘The Cow of the Year’.


 

Out in the paddocks the air was abuzz;

A sense of excitement was growing,


As word went about that the farmer was out


To pick up the cows who were going.


 

“He’s bound to take us,” said a heifer called Jane,

“Our horns are a sight to behold.”


“And surely he’ll see,” said her sister, Lorraine,


“Our hides fairly shimmer like gold.”


 


 


Then a voice ‘cross the way said, “I’d love to go too.”


‘Twas the sweet gentle mooing of Molly Malloo. “But dear Molly,” they giggled, “he’ll never pick you.”


 

“Your horns are all wonky. Your hair is a mess.

You’re wide in the rump, you would have to confess.


Your tail is all tatty and as for those thighs,


Have you seen your reflection? They’re not the right size.


To think you’d be chosen is simply absurd.


Just face it,” they teased her, “YOU’RE FROM THE WRONG HERD!”


Oh dear. Oh, my word.


 

Poor Molly Malloo. What was she to do?

Perhaps they were right. Perhaps it was true.


She thought of The Show and her misery grew.


So, she lay by the creek and she cried, “Moo-hoo-hoo.”


 


To be continued…


“Hibiscus In A Hurry“ by Celia Berrell

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Hibiscus In A Hurry

 

 

The hasty Hibiscus has burst into flower.

A glamorous beauty that seems a bit rude.

Its bloom only lasts about twenty four hours

before it will wilt to a shrivelling prude.

 

Its pistil’s so long, like it’s poked out its tongue

to grab the attention of passers-by.

The tip has a group of five stigmas it’s hung

to catch any pollen before it will die.

 

Along the pink sides of its long pistil style

the anthers hold pollen that’s yellow and bright.

Like sparks flying off from a Catherine-wheel

or sparkler lit on a dusky night.

 

With silky-soft petals in reds, white or gold

they need to attract pollinators for hire.

Impatient, imposing.  They’re terribly bold.

Like flowery dragons all breathing fire.

 

by Celia Berrell

(a fancy-dress pollen party)

“Van-nana” by Sioban Timmer

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Van – nana

 

 

A bunch of monkeys at the zoo

Devised a daring plan

To create a small diversion

And then steal the keeper’s van

 

They waited ‘til his back was turned

And swung behind the wheel

The keeper didn’t notice

‘Til he heard his tyres squeal

 

They headed for the fruit and veg

The customers all ran

As monkeys swiped bananas

And threw them in the van

 

They tore their way right through the town

With crazy monkey smiles

When the ‘nanas and the fuel ran out

They’d gone a hundred miles

 

The van was found much later

The policeman stroked his chin

And pondered how he should report

A Combi full of skins

“Spring Monster”  by Celia Berrell

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With crimson eyes

and slobbery face

this monster is

a sad disgrace.

Behaving like

a snot-grenade

which shoots out goo

that’s sneezed and sprayed.

 

She moans and groans

a burbled sigh,

then coughs and splutters

low and high.

So do you think

it’s best I leave her …

now my friend has

spring hay fever?

 

“RIP the ones at the bottom“ by Kesta Fleming

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RIP the ones at the bottom

 

Bananas, bananas, bananas galore

Pushing and shoving to get through the door,

Bananas, bananas spew forth from the van

Their desperate escape all part of the plan.

 

Hand upon hand, fingers yellow and plump –

All starting to turn and condemned to the dump –

They have to get out … claw free while they’re able

And hope they get noticed then put on the table.

 

A mission to nourish and not go to waste,

They hurry and scramble, and yet in their haste

The ones at the bottom, forlorn and forgotten,

Are squashed by the weight and so doomed to go rotten.

 

“Banana on the bus” by James Aitchison

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Banana on the bus

 

Bananas in a yellow stream

Have tumbled from the bus.

If you eat one and I do too,

There’s plenty there for us.

 

Bananas falling everywhere,

But where are all the bins?

If we eat ev’ry single one,

Where will we put their skins?

“Bananas” by Toni Newell

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Bananas

Who loves a banana?

I know I really do,

They’re tasty and filling,

Are very good for you.

Source of potassium,

Very easy to peel,

And if you are hungry,

They almost make a meal.

“Unbeatable Bananas” by Monty Edwards

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Unbeatable Bananas

 

Bananas are the perfect fruit –

I’m sure you must agree,

But even if they aren’t for you,

They surely are to me.

They beckon with their yellow skin

And brighten up my day,

A single zip and I am in

To eat without delay,

An orange on the other hand

Will take an age to peel;

Compare banana with its zip.

It’s really quite ideal.

 

Now you may think an apple best

And even eat its skin,

But you won’t want to eat it all

Since there’s a core within.

A juicy pear will be the same,

With core not nice to eat,

Bananas on the other hand

You can consume complete.

Not peaches though, or nectarines:

You soon will bite on stone!

But no banana breaks a tooth.

Bananas stand alone!

 

 

Just try to eat a pineapple,

If no-one’s there but you!

You certainly will need a knife:

A strong and sharp one too!

Before you even get to eat

You’ll need to cut some more,

Since you won’t want that prickly skin

Or eat the central core.

One fruit surely lead the way:

It’s soft, it’s quick, it’s sweet.

No fruit is more convenient,

Banana’s hard to beat!

 

“Great Grannie’s birthday gift” by Jenny Erlanger

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Great Grannie’s birthday gift

 

Great Grannie has a letter

from a star who’s never met her

and who wishes her the very, very best.

 

It’s really quite uncanny

that she wrote to our Great Nannie

but I know Great Nannie’s feeling pretty blessed.

 

We’re amazed (and who could blame us)

that an idol who’s so famous

was prepared to take this break from her routine.

 

And although I feel no malice,

I am just a little jealous

that Great Grannie’s got a letter from the queen.