Heading To the Game
I prodded my mate as we rode on the train.
“You know that we’re just gonna thrash you again.
Your players are either too short or too slow.
It’s a foregone conclusion. Just thought you should know.
“Besides, your team’s mascot. Mate, give me a break.
A platypus? That is a major mistake!
A lion or tiger might stir up some fear.
A platypus? Your blokes have got no idea!
“And why is it purple? I tell you, it’s sad.
A team needs a mascot that’s scary and bad.
Yours just looks weird. It’s not a good look.
No wonder the team you support is so crook.”
My mate simply smiled. He wasn’t upset.
“You’re really so certain? Well, let’s have a bet.
You look and you sound like a back-country bumpkin.
You can share my soup later.” “Tomato?” “No, pumpkin.”
Stephen Whiteside
- Submitted in response to Poetry Prompt #9

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